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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 19:27:20 GMT -5
I inch away slowly as Lumi is ditracted by Jiraiya.
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Post by bodie the almighty and awesome on Sept 29, 2007 19:30:25 GMT -5
((will you be Jiraiya plz? it's weird talking to myself))
"OMG I love your book it is so delicious and smexy and awesome!" cried Lumiere.
"Lumi, what do I do about HIM?" Dave poked Lumiere, indicated the sleeping O.F.U. (Oh? F*** YOU!!) on the floor.
"Shut up Dave! Can you not see I am talking to the author of a porn book? Duh," scoffed Lumiere.
"FINE!" cried Dave, angry at the man he'd once loved and thought was smexy.
The supreme irony here is that the real Dave is a die-hard Pryo...
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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 19:34:34 GMT -5
I continue to inch away slowly... I find Ino right next to me. "Hey Ino-Chan," I whisper, "Go up to Lumiere and screw him, okay, Ino? Please?" I'm like whimpering like:   Shes like "okay okay okay slore/Wlut (hore mixed w/slutt) I'm like ;D  |
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Post by bodie the almighty and awesome on Sept 29, 2007 19:37:19 GMT -5
Lumiere turned away from Jiraiya when he saw Ino walking over. "Bonjour madamoiselle! You look mighty sexy today, I might add."
Dave walked pver to Jiraiya once Lumiere was distracted. "Look, hi, I'm Dave. I was born during an awkward silence 16 years ago. Anyway, I know you wrote a book filled with pictures of naked women," he continued, lowering his voice, "and I was wondering if you had any naked men ones...?"
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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 19:43:39 GMT -5
Hearing this, I run away, saying, "I'm free! Free from the Frenchperv!! (sinsong) Lumi hears me!! DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!
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Post by bodie the almighty and awesome on Sept 29, 2007 19:46:44 GMT -5
Lumiere looked from Ino to Akemi. He knew he had to choose: Ino, who he'd just met but thought was mighty pretty, or Akemi, who was kind and beautiful and could kick butt, and he knew she liked him too. Akemi was so hard-to-get, and Ino was right here, but alas, the easiest person to kiss isn't always the best. And in that moment Lumiere made up his mind.
HE'D RAPE BOTH OF THEM LAWL!
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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 19:50:42 GMT -5
I hear the thoughts crossing his mind and yell REALLY loud and fierce: "You want to rape us both? huh? Well you just try," I scream and get out my big sword.
[shadow=red,left,300]Just try to rape me, Frenchie.[/shadow]
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Post by bodie the almighty and awesome on Sept 29, 2007 19:55:07 GMT -5
"Rape? I was hoping you would agree to sex voluntarily," said Lumiere. "Akemi, my dear, there is something I must confess... I love you."
Suddenly O.F.U. raised his weary head. "Ohhhhhh what happened?" he moaned. "I feel awful... I miss the castle... just think, I could be eating a warm bowl of pudding right now... why do I feel so... dizzy... ugh, I feel sick." He sat down precariously on a barstool, which groaned under his weight.
"You drank thirteen bottles of Sake," hissed Lumiere. "Now shut up and let me play with the hot girls."
"Yes, sure," Cogsworth said, still dizzy. "The master had a job in mind for us... he wanted us to... I can't think right now. Ugh. I need pudding. WHO HAS PUDDING?"
Dave inched slowly away. Coggie scared him when he was like this. And besides, he'd just noticed the guy behind the counter was SMEXY.
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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 19:58:04 GMT -5
(By now Neji and Naruto and Gaara have left) "Oh, voluntary? thats totally fine lolz!" ;D   [glow=green,10,300]Come and get me or not[/glow] |
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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 19:59:13 GMT -5
"AGH I DIDNT SAY THAT!!! GET OFF OF ME YOU SEX ADDICT!"
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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 20:00:23 GMT -5
"WTF IS FUCKING WRONG WITH ME, YEAH? I CANT CONTROL MYSELF, UN!!!
OMFG IM STARTING TO TALK LIKE DEIDARA!
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Post by bodie the almighty and awesome on Sept 29, 2007 20:01:38 GMT -5
Lumiere gaped at his luck, embracing Akemi to his (now SAG) chest. "Akemi! I knew you loved me! Come here, you sexy mess of mind-control! I knew you were just putting on a show for the others! That I was your one true love!"
"You know, you're kind of cute," Ino said suddenly to Dave.
Dave and the guy behind the counter exchanged a look. "I'm taken."
"Has the shipment of European food come in yet?" Cogsworth asked the bartender desperately. "Please, I feel extremely odd and I have no idea why..."
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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 20:07:15 GMT -5
"okay....why am i not screaming in anger?" i think to myself. "probably cuz this feels good....HEY WTF?? one, get off me you flirt, two I will kill you with my bloody chainsaw. DID YOU HEAR THAT, YOU SMEXY BEAST? CHAINSAW!!"
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Post by IGGY on Sept 29, 2007 20:09:55 GMT -5
"GAARA BABY HELP ME!!!" Gaara comes running. "whats wrong, Akemi?" "He's raping me! LETS BUTCHER HIM!!" Gaara nods happily. "Now this is what I calll a date, Akemi!"
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Post by bodie the almighty and awesome on Sept 29, 2007 20:11:12 GMT -5
"Beast? That is my master," said Lumiere. "And no, I will not let you go, cherie, until we have been doing this as long as all the stars in the sky have been there. Or at least until I get home and can play with my mistress/Babette/Angelique/Mrs. Potts. (WTF???)"
"Lumiere, we have a job to do, there's no TIME for that." Feeling a bit better, Cogsworth assumed his usual pompous, pushy, I'm-so-important role. (basically the one Chelsea loves so much <3) "Come on! We have to aquire a certain item for the master!"
Lumiere raised his eyebrows. "What item would this be."
"The, you know..." He whispered something in Lumiere's ear that Akemi couldn't hear.
Of course, the Oh-So-Sexy OFU pocketwatch had no idea about her mind-reading skills...
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Shes like "okay okay okay slore/Wlut (hore mixed w/slutt) I'm like ;D 
